mosaic

i'm strong, like a mosaic
a million broken pieces, a collage
that only makes sense when you see it all at once
truth is, i'm as broken as you
but i will dance in the midst of missing puzzle pieces
because life never gets perfect; it wasn't meant to be
i can't wait for the answers that never come
or wade through the mess and confusion
i'm trapped in the walls of my own mind; aren't we all?
even if i got out, the world wouldn't make sense to me
we could walk 100 years and still be ourselves
we'd add lots of colors
beautiful, broken shards of glass

someday we'll get there
put it all together
see ourselves from far away
and the mosaic will make sense

highlights

These past two and a half months have been amazing.  I can't believe how much has happened and how quickly the time has passed.   This picture is from my very first day, and only a couple of these people are still here.  But the exciting thing is that the current staff is almost all staying for 9 or 10 months.  And they're just as lovely as the wonderful people who have left already.  

 Seriously, the staff here is wonderful.  We've got mostly Germans, some English people, a few Americans, and a few Dutchies!  

So, my schedule is pretty irregular.  I occasionally work in the cafe.  Like, for example, these delicious Nutella frappucinos.

I'm also a cleaner supervisor, which means I get the opportunity to work alongside some great people who usually don't know Jesus.  We keep cleaners for about a month, and we have daily devotions with them.  It can be a pretty exhausting shift, but it's also the most rewarding!  Check out some of my favorite cleaners: Kostas (Greek), Marco (German), and Etta (American).

Bust most of my shifts are at reception, and I love it!  Welcoming people into the hostel is super great.  

I should also mention that I've seen some beautiful and fun things.  Amsterdam is absolutely full of history, old buildings, and cool museums.

I've also had some really awesome roommates, like Rachel (from Iowa) and Rebekah (from England).

This is the cafe, where I get to have a lot of conversations with guests, cleaners, and staff!

Enjoy a few more pics of the people I love, pictured below.  ;)

Oh, and don't forget that time that Rachel and I organized a hostel night, complete with games, a message, and a dinner for about 50 people.  It was a masquerade theme, and I talked about being authentic with God and with others, and I played a song on my uke.  So fun!

These past couple months have been full of firsts.  Like destroying a guitar with my bare hands.  Biking more than I ever have before in my whole life.

More importantly, they've been full of God.  Worship on the patio.  Sharing my testimony a billion times.  Devotions and small groups and praying together.


So there's a short glimpse into my life.  Let me know what you want to see!  Sorry about the long blog silence.  More to come!

what would you have done?

I find it hard explaining to people why I came to Amsterdam.  But I know why I'm here.  Does that make sense?  Of course it doesn't.  Just the ramblings of a scatterbrained adventurer.

What I mean is that God is up to so much, and I know I'll be seeing the puzzle pieces fit together.

And one of those pieces is human trafficking, which you will be hearing a lot more about in the future.

But for now, I'd like to give you a glimpse into the "sheltered" life to which I'm quickly adapting!

I live in a staff house with like 35 other crazy people.  It can be a little hectic when it comes to sharing the kitchen or doing our chores, but I am in love with each of these people.  It's the kind of community that I know we're meant to live in, yet rarely able to find.  They encourage each other, bless each other, cook for, clean up after, worship with, cry with, dance with each other.  It's a beautiful place where broken people come together to make a gorgeous mosaic of love for Jesus.

I have two roommates.  Rebekah, the Brit, and Nicola, the German.  Our room is the best, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!  I sleep on a top bunk, so it feels a little bit like being in college again. 

The house is like a 10 minute bike ride from the hostel.  Biking here feels a bit like playing crazy taxi.

I'm typing this blog up from the reception desk.  I'm starting to feel very comfortable behind this desk, but tomorrow I'll leave my comfort zone again and have my first cafe shift!  I was excited about cafe when I thought it would be Starbucks-esque, but I've learned enough to know that involves quite a lot more cooking!  Since I'm only proficient in making grilled cheese sandwiches, this whole hostel is in for a fun surprise!!  Holland is playing Argentina right now, and I don't need to watch the game to know every single time something exciting is happening in the game.  The entire city holds its breath when someone might score.  It's so much fun to watch the World Cup from here.

Twice a week we have Ministry Training Program.  Today's MTP was about leading Bible Discussions, which we have in the hostel every night. 

I love Amsterdam because everything is so accessible.  If I want pizza, I can just walk down the street until I see some.  Besides that, the entire city is steeped in culture, history, beauty.  I love the canals.  I hate biking.  I love stroopwoffels.  I hate the red light district.  I love hagelslag.  I hate coffee shops. I love people. 

I finally got over to the Anne Frank Huis last night.  (Finally might seem off since I've only been here a week, but the house is literally a five minute walk from the hostel.)  The house was a lot bigger than I thought.  Still, it was a very emotional experience to think of so many people in hiding and so many in concentration camps or dead.  Still, the number hardly compares to the 27 million in slavery today, but we hardly talk about it.  Why is that?  Is it just easier to talk about problems we used to have than problems we have now?  Is this the truth of every generation - that it is so easy for us to say we would have hidden jews or we would have freed the slaves, if we had been alive in that time?  But when it comes to the reality of today, we close our eyes.  Because the truh is more than we can bear.  To find justice in all of it, we would have to sacrifice so much.  Or we could turn the other way, and that's so much more attractive of an option, isn't it? 

Because the would-haves of a different time mean nothing for today.  We both know that today has its own problems, tragedies, and injustices.  In 50 or 100 years people will look back and say, "If I had been alive in that time, I would have ..."  But you're the one that's here now.  And would you have?  Would you?  Are you?

So the question is the same as it always has been and always will be.  What's your life about?  What would you do if you were alive now?