February 27, 2014

christian sluts

This is my soapbox.  So listen up.  Because this is the blog I've been dying to write for a year.

Let us start with the title.  Does it piss you off?  Are you indignant?  If I use strong words today, it's because I feel very strongly about this.

In honor of "Shine a Light on Slavery Day," I'm going to do my part to shine a light on the role that you are playing.  In fact, I know very few (if any) Christian women who have not played a role in the culture of slavery that is prevalent in the world today.

Christian women dehumanize women they view as "sluts" or "skanks,"


It breaks my heart that Christian women, who should be using a community of love to bring all lost and lonely women into the fold, dehumanize other women.  I know this is true because I did it myself.  We Christian women oftentimes pride ourselves on modesty.  We made all these rules for ourselves - rules about leggings and dress length and camis.  We work hard to follow them, and then we are disgusted when we see women who do not conform to the dress code that we have created.  And something happens in that moment, we feel morally superior.  This feeling inside of our hearts is bad enough, but sometimes we even vocalize or express these by calling her immodest, ostracizing her, or giving her a look of disgust.

Do you know why you are offended when you see a phrase like "christian sluts"?  Because "slut," as well as "skank, whore, etc." are degrading.  If you wouldn't want someone to describe you that way, how dare you use it (if only in your mind) to describe any other girl out there?

Dehumanizing leads to objectification.


Starting to view women this way, as if they are less because they dress or act a certain way, leads to objectification.  This is why we ask what a woman was wearing or how she was behaving before she got raped.  Because, in our culture, "not being raped" is not an inherent human right.  It has to be earned by  your conformity to society's standards of modesty and how a "respectable" woman should act.  The woman becomes an object, and "I'm sorry, but how could you not expect a man to play with such a shiny toy once you put it out there?"

For more about this, see educator Laci Green -

Objectification is the excuse for slavery.

If a person is an object, I can sell it, no problem.  These women are bought and sold like cattle, with absolutely no regard to them aside from how much money they can make the men around them.  Remember the 3/5ths compromise?  That's when America decided that African Americans would count as a little more than half a person.  The population of slaves in our world today are invisible to us, with no rights.  They get offered a job in another country, and then they disappear forever.  And when we see them on the streets, propisitioning men, we despise them and look at them like they're less than human.

And so it goes full circle.

They're enslaved because of how we think of them, and we judge them because they're enslaved.


The process starts with you.  Change the way you think about women, think about people.  Respect all human beings and their right to freedom.  Or will you look the other way, because you were fortunate to be born in a part of the world where this is a rare problem for you?  Though the U.S. may not have a high rate of human trafficking (though trust me, it happens), our attitudes still increase trafficking around the world.  The first step in ending rape culture is respecting all humans' right to freedom (and to not be raped).  And to do so, we must abolish words like "slut."

So next time you see a woman who doesn't fit your idea of how a women should dress and act, try being her friend, instead of signing away her humanity in your own mind.

Next time you think, "those shorts are too short," or "oh my gosh, she is showing way too much boob," maybe you can take a minute to pray for her.  Don't pray that she changes her clothes.  And don't assume that she doesn't have Jesus either.  Don't even pray that she will respect herself more; you have no idea how she feels about herself.  Pray for her right not to be objectified or dehumanized by anyone.

www.enditmovement.com

February 4, 2014

maya maya

Being here, being anywhere, you get used to the things you see.  Heartbreak and tragedy just don't hit you the same way.  How could it?  If you see something every day, it starts to seem normal.  I suppose that's how we, as a world, can let horrible things happen, if we are eased into them slowly.

But one little girl has woken my heart back up and broken it all over again.

Her name is Maya.  What can I tell you about her?  She's more musically-oriented than any other child I've ever known.  If she's fussy, you can turn some music on or start singing; she'll forget why she's mad and start dancing.  She sings along with every song I have, even the first time she hears it.  She loves Quincy, when most of the other little ones are afraid of my harmless kitty cat.  She's content to watch me work out, as long as I blow her a kiss as I walk on by.  She's beautiful, absolutely beautiful, with the best smile you could ever see.  She's the happiest little girl I've ever known.

What else could I tell you?  Just a couple months ago, she was severely malnourished - about 6 lbs at age 2.  She was abandoned at the hospital, and my friend Ashley found her and started to take care of her.  Today, she is doing well and has gained lots of weight!  I look at her, and I'm suddenly angry.

Who could do this?  What kind of a person would leave this precious, adorable baby to die, alone in a hospital?

And as quickly as my anger was inflamed, it dissipates.  What kind of a person would do this?  A desperate person, with no hope of keeping the precious baby alive.  Maybe her father thought the hospital could find her a better life.  Or maybe he just didn't want to watch her die.

Whose fault is this?  Mine.  Yours.  Every person who has a lot in this world is burdened with the responsibility for its condition.  I don't want to be a part of a world that leaves beautiful baby girls to die alone in the hospital.  I want to be a part of the world that finds a way to restore the families, to restore the children, a world that doesn't let a single child slip through its fingers unnoticed and unloved.

Just look at her.







Love.