detours

Sometimes the best places are the places you find yourself by accident.

I've been neglecting to write this post because I know I can't find all the right words to say what I mean.  But here it goes.

Not leaving for Haiti in May is one of the hardest things I've been through in quite some time.  I struggled with the fact that I had felt so sure that God was calling me to that situation in particular; so why didn't it work out?  With that in the back of my mind, I still had some really great experiences this summer.

I went to Honduras, which was lovely.  Being a first grade teacher pushed me way out of my comfort zone, which is a place I love to be!  But not that many things scare me, so I don't get to be out of my comfort zone that often.  I learned a lot, grew, and met a lot of wonderful people.  If I had gone to Haiti, I might never have been able to go to Honduras.

I lived in Maryland and got to know a lot of great people.  I got to live with the Hogans and get to know their whole family better.  I don't know about you, but there aren't a lot of things better than a night in, watching a funny movie with your best friend and eating stove-popped popcorn.

Meanwhile, nothing was working out in the search for other organizations to work with.  It was excruciating.  One organization said that there was a need for someone like me, took two months to review my application and contact my references, and then said they actually didn't need anyone.  One organization somehow lost my ONLINE application as well as several e-mails that I sent them.  A few other organizations somehow NEVER responded to attempts to get in contact with them.  The one organization that did look good just felt wrong.  It was so hard to say no, not knowing if any other opportunities would present themselves.  But I just had this gut feeling that organization wasn't the answer.

And I went to Chyrsalis.  Which was basically a young adult retreat filled with God and and empty of distractions.  No phones.  No jobs.  You don't even get to pour yourself a soda.  You hardly lift a finger the whole weekend.  If you ever get the chance to take a Chrysalis/Emmaus weekend, DO IT.  Trust me; you won't regret it.
That's where I was honest with myself and admitted that I hadn't really been trusting God since everything happened with Haiti.  Everyone kept telling me that God had something better in mind, but how could it be true?  How could anything be better than what I was going to have?
And I let it go.  I nailed it to the cross - both literally and metaphorically.  Yes, trusting God is a choice we have to make all the time, every day, but sometimes we really, really have to make it.  Make the decision to trust God even more than we've ever trusted Him before.  And I did.  And I honestly said the next morning to one of the leaders of the retreat - that I wasn't afraid or worried at all, even though I had no idea about the future and had no prospects.  And I'm really glad because it's an issue that would've gone on the wayside if I had figured out where I was going before Chrysalis.

And now in true detour fashion, I am going where I was going to go in the beginning.  A different city - Port Salut, but the same lovely people - Shannon and Lena.  Though the road to where I am now is not the road that I meant to take, it has been perfect.  There's still more to come.  I'm going to D.C. and New York in the next couple weeks!  Then off to see my friends in KY and my mom in FL before I leave for Haiti in 16 days!  Crazy!

Well, I hope that explains it, but you can always e-mail me if you'd like more information about any of my recent experiences.